Related
Lady : Is this my train?
Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady : Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi.
Station Master : No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy.
Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.
A drunkard was brought to court. Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted, "Order, order."
The drunkard immediately responded, "Thank you, your honor, I'll have a
scotch and soda."
Customer : If I post this letter tonight, will it get to Delhi in two days time?
Post Master : Yes sir, it definitely will.
Customer : I bet you, it won't.
Post Master : Why not?
Customer : It's addressed to Mumbai.
An absent-minded man went to see a psychiatrist.
'My trouble is,' he said, 'that I keep forgetting things.'
'How long has this been going on?' asked the psychiatrist.
'How long has what been going on?' said the man.
Girl : Do you love me?
Boy : Yes Dear.
Girl : Would you die for me?
Boy : No, mine is undying love.
1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!
2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor.
1st thief : Hurry! this is no time for superstitions.
Man : How old is your father?
Boy : As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy : He became a father only when I was born.
Teacher : Correct the sentence, "A bull and a cow is grazing in the field"
Student : A cow and a bull is grazing in the field
Teacher : How?
Student : Ladies first.
Waiter : I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer : Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu card.
Customer : Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter : Can't you tell the difference by taste?
Customer : No, I can't.
Waiter : Then does it really matter?
Customer : Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.
Waiter : Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers.
Customer : Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.
Waiter : That's all right sir, he won't drink much.
Customer : Waiter, there's a fly swimming in my soup.
Waiter : So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?
Customer : Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea cup?
Waiter : I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.
Customer : Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter : Funny? But then why aren't you laughing?
Teacher : Peter, why are you late for school again?
Peter : Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and the game went into extra time.
lol, nice jokes and thx for sharing it.
I especially like the "how old is your father" one and the "dinner choices' one
Really GOOD jokes, im LMAO!!!!
thanx for sharin' buddy..
My turn...
Q: How many software developers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Sorry dude, that's a hardware problem.
A man walks into a bar with a haddock under his arm and asks "Do you sell fish cakes?".
"Sorry but no", comes the reply.
"That's a shame", says he, "It's his birthday".
Old joke but funny (and about the only clean one i know !)
A guy walks in to a bar, grabs a stool and orders a drink. He takes a few sips when suddenly he hears a small voice say "thats a nice shirt", he looks round but theres nobody sitting by him, so he thinks nothing of it and starts drinking again, a few minutes later he hears "oh what a great tie" again he turns but again there's no one about, the barman sees him looking about and asks "problem sir ?" the guy tells the barman he keeps hearing a voice, the barman smiles and says "don't worry mate its just the complimentary nuts"
Forum members...
How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to
condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is
perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.
How do I change a lightbulb?
You forgot the 6 that complain about the cost of changing a light bulb and want it done for free for them. And the 4 that tell the complainers "If you don't like the cost, then live in the dark."
...and the 287 that wait until the lightbulb has been changed and then ask when the next lightbulb will be fitted
Re: Lightbulb
You Lightbulb guys are amazing, one gotta look at the extent of your imagination, hats off to u, buddies. Love to b a part of this community.
Adieu..
Lightbulb...
...and then 1 weirdo (me) will post about what happed to the lightbulb when he got the mad idea of shocking the lightbulb with a taser gun before fitting it... hehe, I looks freakin cool guys, the electricity runs up and down between the wires and you can see little flames on each side!!
rohitsharman said:
You Lightbulb guys are amazing, one gotta look at the extent of your imagination, hats off to u, buddies. Love to b a part of this community.
Adieu..
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
Hehe, I love my imagination and it loves me.. mix that with my signature (see below) and you'll be well on your way to a very interesting and fun filled life!!
It's an honour for me to also be part of this community!!
Addicted...
You know you are addicted to the Internet when...
You kiss your girlfriend's home page.
Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.
Your eyeglasses have a web site burned in on them.
All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a faster connection to the net: 28.8...ISDN...cable modem...T1...T3.
And even your night dreams are in HTML.
You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.
You start introducing yourself as "Jim at I-I-Net dot net dot au
Your heart races faster and beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW site address in print or on TV, even though you've never had heart problems before.
You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved and you don't have a clue when it happened.
You turn on your intercom when leaving the room so you can hear if new e-mail arrives.
Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.
All of your friends have an @ in their names.
When looking at a pageful of someone else's links, you notice all of them are already highlighted in purple.
Your dog has its own home page.
You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.
You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.
You don't know the sex of three of your closest friends, because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.
Your husband tells you he's had the beard for 2 months.
You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop and check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
You tell the kids they can't use the computer because "Daddy's got work to do" and you don't even have a job.
You buy a Captain Kirk chair with a built-in keyboard and mouse.
Your wife makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed."
You get a tatoo that says "This body best viewed with Netscape 2.01 or higher."
You never have to deal with busy signals when calling your ISP...because you never log off.
The last girl you picked up was only a jpeg.
You ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a toilet.
Your wife says communication is important in a marriage...so you buy another computer and install a second phone line so the two of you can chat.
As your car crashes through the guardrail on a mountain road, your first instinct is to search for the "back" button.
py2o|\|oI|) said:
You know you are addicted to the Internet when...
You kiss your girlfriend's home page.
Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.
Your eyeglasses have a web site burned in on them.
All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a faster connection to the net: 28.8...ISDN...cable modem...T1...T3.
And even your night dreams are in HTML.
You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.
You start introducing yourself as "Jim at I-I-Net dot net dot au
Your heart races faster and beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW site address in print or on TV, even though you've never had heart problems before.
You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved and you don't have a clue when it happened.
You turn on your intercom when leaving the room so you can hear if new e-mail arrives.
Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.
All of your friends have an @ in their names.
When looking at a pageful of someone else's links, you notice all of them are already highlighted in purple.
Your dog has its own home page.
You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.
You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.
You don't know the sex of three of your closest friends, because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.
Your husband tells you he's had the beard for 2 months.
You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop and check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
You tell the kids they can't use the computer because "Daddy's got work to do" and you don't even have a job.
You buy a Captain Kirk chair with a built-in keyboard and mouse.
Your wife makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed."
You get a tatoo that says "This body best viewed with Netscape 2.01 or higher."
You never have to deal with busy signals when calling your ISP...because you never log off.
The last girl you picked up was only a jpeg.
You ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a toilet.
Your wife says communication is important in a marriage...so you buy another computer and install a second phone line so the two of you can chat.
As your car crashes through the guardrail on a mountain road, your first instinct is to search for the "back" button.
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
Good one, mate.
I think, i already have some of these symptoms in me..
....
rohitsharman said:
Good one, mate.
I think, i already have some of these symptoms in me..
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
Then there's a good chance that you also have the following symptoms...
You can't sit through an entire movie without having at least one device on your body beep or buzz.
You think of the gadgets in your office as "friends", but you forget to send your father a birthday card.
In computer shops, you eavesdrop on a salesman talking with customers, butt in to correct him and spend 20 minutes answering the customers' questions, while the salesman stands by silently, nodding his head.
You back up your data every day.
On holiday, you read a computer manual and turn the pages faster than those who read John Grisham novels.
You go to trade shows and map out your path of the exhibit hall in advance. But you can't give someone directions to your house without looking up street names.
You would rather get more dots per inch than miles per gallon.
You are so knowledgeable about technology that you feel secure enough to say "I don't know" when someone asks you a technology question instead of feeling compelled to make something up.
You understand all these jokes.
If so, technology has taken over your life. We suggest you go lie under a tree and write a book.... and don't use a laptop!!
….I myself have a few of the above mentioned symptoms and it’s nothing to cause feelings of unworthiness, in fact I’m actually damn proud of it because that is what sets us apart from the human race, we’re part a breed with unique minds that surpasses those of normal beings and that makes our way of living much more advanced…. The end.
In computer shops, you eavesdrop on a salesman talking with customers, butt in to correct him and spend 20 minutes answering the customers' questions, while the salesman stands by silently, nodding his head.
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
I do that at Best Buy all the time. They should higher smarter people!
py2o|\|oI|) said:
Then there's a good chance that you also have the following symptoms...
You back up your data every day.
You are so knowledgeable about technology that you feel secure enough to say "I don't know" when someone asks you a technology question instead of feeling compelled to make something up.
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
ha ha ha, i liked the 2nd one, and i do take a backup everyday.
My girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home
Tech Support...
The tech support problem dates back to long before the industrial revolution, when primitive tribesmen beat out a rhythm on drums to communicate:
This fire help. Me Groog
Me Lorto. Help. Fire not work.
You have flint and stone?
Ugh
You hit them together?
Ugh
What happen?
Fire not work.
Make spark?
No spark, no fire, me confused.
Fire work yesterday.
You change rock?
I change nothing
You sure?
Me make one change.
Stone hot so me soak in stream so stone not burn Lorto hand. Small change, shouldn't keep Lorto from make fire.
*Grabs club and goes to Lorto's cave*
*WHAM*WHAM*WHAM*WHAM*
It was a night unlike any other day,
I was standing on the edge of the cliff hugging the sunset - it kicked me in the head at about 40dB and asked me to leave her be so that she can finish her shift but alas, the moon stood her up.
I turned and walked in reverse. I fell. I fell again. I fell again. I was sick of falling so I got up when suddenly I felt myself surrounded. I felt right.
2 VR6 dogs, one brown, one left started negotiating with me a monologue and when they were done, they started running towards me with an ambition never seen that night. they worked on me for a few hours to think they're dogs. their work yielded my bones.
The cliff drew me towards itself. I pulled back but found it was charged with attractivity and i stayed hanging on it's lip. it screamed. I realized that David Copperfield is dead for a while now thus he cannot help me up.. and besides.. he's an asshole.
I grabbed the tongue of a mexican eggplant passing in its car at the same moment. assuming I prefered to stay alive, I decided to claim my innocence and ask the honorable eggplant to lift me up not foreseeing any dagner since an eggplant as all eggplants, is mute. Murphey decided to prove me wrong and the eggplant asked for a cigarette. to my surprise, I fell down.
Death was quick and insensitive, it cursed my existance in every possible way until i bled diet cola.
I returned to my home petit, and sprained my ankle. It hurt. As i sat to eat breakslow, my brain figured out that a mechanical catalogization of the day's happenings will certainly be preceived as a routine incident of prehistorical philanthropy and so, I will save the world. I sew a custome. returning to the cliff, I triple jumped from the cliff for inspiration but found that I am not strong enough as to flap my hands so to keep me in the air for more than a few moments and I banged my head on a sharp rock which calibrated its position to hit my brain a few moments before i landed.
A cornslice came out of an unhomogeneous door, stroke me a niner and lost itself to death.. poor corn.
spunked up, my decision to finish the day was fatal to my socks. I fell asleep to death.
I didnt know mescaline was still popular. I once puked whole sheets of plywood.
I was supposed to eat that pill? I gave it away as candy on halloween! I guess I live in a bad neighborhood so no harm done, right?
"There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a mod in the depths of an ether binge. And I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon."
..........
MMMMMMMMMMM.............weed...............mmmmmmmmmmmm
wOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
CHOCOLATE RAIN!
i think nir is on crack today, or is it the studies
i actually followed evey word
it a whirlwind of emotion
mikechannon said:
I have to admit it is weirdly, madly deeply poetic. Certainly more than a walk on the embers of love with happiness obliterating the beacon of doom - well I think so anyway It reminds me of those heady days savouring the delights of that mushy wench, Psilosybin Mexicana.
Mike
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
So you have visited and tested one of the Mexican deligths uh?
MMMMMMMMMM...................shrooms.....................mmmmmmmmmm
I don't use drugs. if in "shrooms" you are implying that i am
nir36 said:
I don't use drugs. if in "shrooms" you are implying that i am
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
Don't worry, like most off topic's , I think the thread has left the OP behind.
ha ha shrooms
feeling totally left out as a teetotaler
it reminded me of a story be phillip k. **** (do andorids dream of electric sheep?, We can remember it for you wholesale, Minority report, paycheck)
i think its called The Story to End All Stories for Harlan Ellison’s Anthology Dangerous Visions and its from Volume V, The Little Black Box of his collected stories.
its basically about two he shes in space having a baby then fighting over it so one of them eats it up then they realise it was god
jayjay8585 said:
ha ha shrooms
feeling totally left out as a teetotaler
it reminded me of a story be phillip k. **** (do andorids dream of electric sheep?, We can remember it for you wholesale, Minority report, paycheck)
i think its called The Story to End All Stories for Harlan Ellison’s Anthology Dangerous Visions and its from Volume V, The Little Black Box of his collected stories.
its basically about two he shes in space having a baby then fighting over it so one of them eats it up then they realise it was god
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
wow. I think i'm going to rewrite his story about that and post it here. sounds like a magical story.
I would like to recommend a few books.
- The man and the dildo, by ingmar booboofixer
- Walking on the moo, by someone who dislikes cows
- Garage Barage, by the US airforce
and
- Mixing up with the likes of thee - a story of brotherhood between sisters, by Horace Blackfont
The man and the dildo, by ingmar booboofixer
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
a story of brotherhood between sisters
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
Originally Posted by nir36 View Post
I don't use drugs. if in "shrooms" you are implying that i am
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
.....
wth isent Quote's included in the 10chars limit?
Bah. I'm hurt. you are all assuming that such talent in writing idiotic, pointless things can only be done by being a junkie. OFFENDED is what i am. OFFENDED!
i dont
respect the mental mod massive!!!!
jayjay8585 said:
i dont
respect the mental mod massive!!!!
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
what was the word i dont for
clearly you guys have gone crazier than I have. so to reclaim my insanitfy i'll post another story i wrote like 6 years ago.
The indian guy who didn't know why (biblical story)
it was 8:00 pm, and it was green
I leaped over to the window to watch a game of EarBall between 2eggplants who tried kick one another in the ear while the "babbit rabbit" ate one of them but the blinds were closed and I couldn't see anything.
I could not ignore the fact that by using an RPG you can just lift the blind and his sister but due the a short workday in radioactive cornflakes factory I gave up the sportive activity required to perform the action.
Even tho it was summer, it wasn't cold. on the contrary, i WAS cold. I went out to the garden to find a best viewing angle but the eggplants were already gone and "babbit rabbit" died from an epileptic siezure due to stamp overlicking.
I wore my underwear, went outside, and back in. I was sick of being inside all day so I came back in and went down to the attic to sort my collection of beans. one bean attacked me with a dropkick to the left brow but i managed to contain it by injecting 6 litres of cyanide to its left lobe. it screamed for help but there was no one there. Yossi died.
As i was sorting my beans by name, i felt a pat on my shoulder. I turned 360 degrees and saw exactly what i was seeing before. I thought that this might've been a defected calculation and maybe 520 more degrees are required... when suddenly, i saw it. a big head with nothing underneath was looking at me through glittering eyes with a huge nose, 2 eyebrows connected by a safety pin and 2 chin dimples.
the glittering eyes with the huge nose turned to me and asked: "who's boy are you?!"
I responded.
This was face traumatizing. since then, i do not go down to the attic anyless to sort beans by name - only by format (bean.exe.. and so forth)..
cartoon you ever saw as a child, and then look it at now and go---
"Boy...it still gives me the heebie jeebies!!!"
For me...it is the Purple Smurfs episode...
Remember that one episode when Lazy smurf begins to chop down a tree, he finds himself pestered by a purple fly who annoyingly circles around him, laughing. Lazy chases the purple fly off into the forest until he trips over a tree root, but after he gets up, he doesn't notice that the purple fly has secretly flown around him and is now behind him, looking at and zooming toward his tail. Lazy yelps in pain and looks to see that his tail is now throbbing, realizing that the purple fly had bit him. Then suddenly Lazy turns purple, and his mind goes blank as he now barks "gnap gnap gnap" and hops off into the forest.
Then everyone gets infected by biting on each other's tail..
Papa smurf finds a cure and as soon as he sprays one of them to cure them, comes a purple smurf to turn them back...
until the end even Papa smurf (the last blue smurf) becomes one--only to be saved by an explosion at his lab...
ScArY!!!!!!
I find the Tweenies scary and I'm 45! There's just something not right about them.
They look like a crossbreed of muppets and a bag of bald, spiky jelly beans...
That fly is kinda cool looking...
For me the scariest was Mumm Ra from Thundercats. Especially when he used to transform from out of that robe.
Second was Skeletor from He-Man.
I remember the cartoon "flying squirrel" and I don´t know what is the name in english of the bad guy, in spanish was "Boris Malosnof" and he was bad bad...
The one on the left
mikechannon said:
Off topic but when I was a kid there was a cartoon called Captain Pugwash for little kids:
It had characters called Master Bates and Seamen Stains. Now I know why I like to dress as a Pirate when I make love
Mike
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
Don't forget Roger The Cabin Boy!
forget the name but think some cartoon movie with some testing animals escaping a Labrador which was forced to do how long can the dog swim tests and the likes
and some other dog
Anyone else here remember "The Brave Little Toaster"?
I like that movie now, but when I was a young child, that movie terrified me. Don't know what I'm talking about? Watch this video, and imagine you're an innocent 5 year old. Now wouldn't that terrify you?
Hello thought i'd put it all together to make it easier to read im still adding but feel free to help add to it
if you cant tell im bored :/ btw also added txt file if you want to add then re upload in []'s is extra info or bits i added to make sense in ()'s is things that were there but don't make much sense
Edit: quite offended by some of the iPad comments on here as im using my ipad for the story and pc for typing
The fat man ran twenty miles round and round until he fell and went to rehab for
falling then he got up and started to dance like a chinpanzee with a very very large
pen in his left pocket, then went to mexico where he dated a rather nice banana in
pinstripes who was suspiciously not what she wanted to eat.
Whilst that's happening far far away on a distant planet where the came back
from the plastic beach geting blown by a mexican guy using a very large thread
closing moderator who closed a very sticky situation.
"Get yourself into a mental rehab" Mcintyre was singing, to an iphone, then found XDA
whilst browsing porn and did stuff with his tiny girl friends hand which was also
another name for a transforming robot which has the power to transform and split into
a HUGELY big piece of junk, which is worthless. Sell it quickly otherwise it will be
an iPhone, then your buggered, unless you dance to the biggest rom chef here whilst
chugging some delicious apple juice, which you made trying to forget about your Apple
with a worm.
Her big headahe caused me agro deep inside my thought about going to get some new
super powers so i can fly to a place where stories end but they don't and continue to
be exruciatingly long when all i want is to smash an iphone over something realy a
work of art like WP7S.
Sink or swim like Captain Planet when he go crying like a dirty girl trying to find
a Golden HD2 party in vegas that had a funny thing attatched [PAGE 10] used for
blowing small little holes in walls and a train that stopped in the middle of the
intergalactic track which was littered with broken iphones which she always hated.
Dark cloudy skies only on Wednesdays or possibly Mondays when there is a spaceship
that used humans for thousands of years as an army to stop apple from taking over
Microsoft Windows Mobile because I love this amazing invention.
Chips glorious Chips wich i threw at your mum with a hot dog in a hallway and
slipped into ROM cooking frenzy but my device dropped into a pile of stinky rotting
apples which i'll eat after, whilst laughing at steve jobs who's such a smoking weed
dude who likes unicorns roasted with sauce on a shiny just washed underpant.
It's about time to watch 'The annoying Orange' advert thats should die very slowly
whilst creating non-lactoseintolerant cheese for his girl friend who likes things
bigger kind of like my big ego [PAGE 15] which also likes tobasco sauce on chilli
con carni and fish and chips in a house with no windows or any apples just palm and
android. Palm was bought by apple machintosh, a stupid brand who has milkshakes and
many cows.However, The cows like to smoke some candy ciggarets on the xda portal and
learn about how to ride starships into orbit whilst eating crispy Kentuck Fried
Chicken and then a big mac attack with fries and mcnugget grenades,whoppers, and
lemonade.
Meanwhile the starship crashed on steve Martin, not jobs, in the market on a sale.
Meanwhile the cockroach was singing with History Maker by Delirious and also with
post man pat, [who] squated and shat on the ipad, which was worse than a frickin
android and palm bad buisnes plan or better put Poop in a pan.
"4 Words bro" said Fallen Spartan laughing his head, Shooting the Armeter with her
hand and then jumped [PAGE 20] out of bed. What a voyage! What a Dream! to the other
side of the world through a wormhole chased the mole through the shoal of sweaty
clothes which then lead to the creation of the cyber phone which killed off
Steve jobs and Apple for good.
April fools day is the beggining to annoy people but its over, not next time because
the oldman died from non stop laughing of a joke about fishing boats and his desire
to feel free swimming in water [being] accused of man slaughter thinking why the
elephant ate a pink ribbon with a text in cuneiform script written in invisible,
about mac os4.0 and it's ability to crap without flushing the toilet and smell like
a decade old.
A new millennium with a giant appetite for apples didn't fill my pocket with lots.
Brush your teeth with a good and very brown chocolate mars bar that everyone hated
[PAGE 25]like an iphone, that people threw in the loo that was nasty just like poo
and like wee little green men [that] seem to run little leprachauns who are evil
No flights allowed due to ash and plane crashes which happened to no one any where.
How's this story going on untill now please advice, which i know makes no sence
but i don't involve myself in any meaningfull conversation [because it] would be
fruitless because he loved all the double posts [because it] help to increase
my post count so i can get 300 posts then get more, nothing to post because a
mod will make you cry for mama.(What the hell are we talking [about] in this thread?
(Simon posting crazy, pimple or boil?, for food or increased post count, no more
flashing, my eyes hurt so i need [to] go to specsavers and get a cool pair of Orsis
sunglasses, Please ban simon [PAGE 30] just because he is quadrupling his post count
haha)
(Feel like puking on this forum because it's something, something green yellow and
blue and that douche called me noobie as well all were once smoke to much simon
posts noncense he wont quit and keep posting read this post Please ban simon second
the motion y'all are mean we are not yes you are why you little amazingly handsome
person you wish buddy like the other no0b that went looking 4 a girlvery very
unlikley he gets love,in his dreams likley to be wet beond measure unless with a
rulerGramatical error encountered stop replying to "the frog went" [Nice try to
start the story again there by M_T_M ] everything i post no frog reply? whadaya
mean by frog)
"Anyway how are you doing today?" "I'm going to make out with your left hand"
also with my HD2 that i use for cooking dinner for my [PAGE 35] beautiful
HTC device.
Rock around the clock, 1 o'clock , no [it's] actualy 3, [oh wait] or maybe 4
when i went to kick (the) steve jobs because of his job trying to build a barbie
house out of iPad's on a piece of broken cardboard whichh happened to have a
HTC HD2 in it, [although] that was broken.
(i Hate braces by XDA forum)
Recieving a punch right at the nose of your very first wife "arhhhhhh~~!!!~!!"
she shout[ed] "pull it out" and kiss my three yellow zucchinis in my hand that i
punch[ed] you [with] in a private place leaving me unconcious because it's big.
(bad grammar again, btw afaic imnsho, speaking in tounges, with avatar accent)
Whilst texting friends from holy tree to a Wower ( Out of idea's hi mr.clown)
and Master Yoda, Shower he took in his pants, a dangerous weapon lurks waiting
for the use on (a hot laptop) an innocent person [and] an elderly woman
who was hot [PAGE 40] he then lol'ed at the age of 85.
Enjoy living in college, this big thing he found yesterday was round and long,
kind of smelly like a soccer ball, or baby even.
Keep her happy for 48 hours, (and) [also] the baby cried for candy that was
spicy and very sweet according to her tounge [which was] used for collecting
more samples, which enhances recreational activities during practice on
monday evenings, running around naked in his house.
(Dang your fast, your just old, but better looking, you wish @ , the age of
50 whilst im only 15 and good looking Beat that, bed ridden always, im sexy
and amazing and every one loves me, high on crack (obviously) and this old
, ignored by old)
The man mentioned in the OP is my bestfriend and also my dress is stained red
like those in my closet that look awful to me and (rock roll animal)
(a mi no me gusta rock musica) potatoes and goats.
[PAGE 45] like llamas and french calendar cookies who enjoy a good cup of
my new senior member memberness.
(that's cheating dude, that's completley right)
Once upon a time there was ( i like desire, i like me, sense made none
mocking you are, forgive me peace, i love u 2,)
Old school stuff is just a joke today from a clown who's named Bozo,
or Mr.Pennywise who makes funny jokes of lemons out of his list of
victims and People magazine [whilst] sharpening his knife [and]
gutting [a] big deer, thinking about stuff [like] the new iphone 4
(random iphone reference??) that was trashed by a gnome.
"Drink more beer" "Out of rum?"
(needs some posting, stop double postingn stop stopping me, you old man, why
i oughta)
Why don't you run like hell outa this website and [then] rush back because of
ORUD.
(whoever that is??, this still going??, amazingly yes continue,Anyway
where were we?, playing this game [PAGE 50], an ORUD is
obessesive Rom updating dissorder, game in overtime , or rolling ur dum butt,
that 3 plus,learn to count,Going party now, well deserved Orb,
arriving from party, welcome back orb.)
Nite, work tomorow,dance all night sleep
all day, Now @ work, i saw something /"\ hahaha, very mature indeed, and sometimes
childish, with some new direction of thinking, whil task 29 phone, when your strange,
strange what galaxys???, thats goors lyrics,obscure reference now, Nonsense funny
thread,)
Miliz is old (why you little) but wise enough to fry squirrels and eat them and
[then give] (gave) them to my hackintosh.
(yo quireo un Hackintosh,) one fine day,( with old men, what the hell, just happened
here?,) withh all this, insane music playin whilst vigrously touching a bald eagle
on a tree branch eating raw monkey flesh till [THE] (he) (grammatical error above)
teacher flunkeed (you) [him] whilst drinking something he doesnt like [PAGE 55]
Reserved for more
One more here
And one more to be safe (almost 200 pages in 4 posts if its completed
Baaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahhaahahahaaaaaaa
Well don Macarony!!! Keep it up
We can have a best seller with that story.
Mr. Clown said:
We can have a best seller with that story.
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
We should make a book out of it....i would buy it
Sent from my ADR6300 using XDA App
pretty f'n' funny.
good day.
hehe yeah publish it nd call it the story of off topic XDA or somthing better starting to some more just got back in
Update now got to page 50 !!!!
bracket () = junk
not mentioning names but it's mostly OG (guests i think), M_T_M and simon_WM just metioning
and were at 1585 words it could almost be a book and 8793 letters
(that might be incorect becaue ive tried 3 they all give me dif results )
Page 55
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
MacaronyMax said:
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
page 55 is the page where i first come in to the three word story!!!!
lol of topic a sec but how did you change your name ??
MacaronyMax said:
lol of topic a sec but how did you change your name ??
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
i contacted @mikechannon and asked him to do it for me!
Cool thanks
So, there's a game I played on PC that I have strong memories and images of but I can't remember the title for the life of me. I was hoping that I could state the things about it I remember and maybe you could help me. I tried Googling it but I think I just confused the search engine. lol
Here goes: It's an RPG, kinda Final Fantasy/Xenogears/Chrono Cross style and it was released within the last 5 years. It starts high up on a mountain that peaks above the cloud line. There's a village there with people who are invisible to everyone but each other. There's an old man as the elder. The protagonist and his blue haired and adorned friend are poking around in some ruins. Ok, something happens where some monsters are starting to show up around the village so the main character has to go down the mountain, through some woods, to the bottom. At some point, they come across some warrior chick who's like a royal guard or something. They come to a long bridge that extends to a capital city. At some point, something happens in the temple there where tapestries and stuff are catching on fire and the protagonist does something extraordinary to stop it and save the day.
Back outside the city, if you're facing the bridge that goes to that capital city and proceed to the right for a bit, you come across a river with a destroyed bridge that no one can mend because some tornado monster thing is lurking on the river. Up the mountain from there it's barren and there's a........dragon(?).....that used to be the brother of some girl with an umbrella that she wants to save. That girl becomes a party member.
There's a lot more I remember, but these are the strongest memories. Please, help me out and gimme a name. Thanks.
BTW, It is NOT an MMO.
Ok, I figured it out. Funny, I was up for 2 hours last night trying to figure it out but I did about 5 minutes after posting this. lol For those of you who are interested, it was Tales of Zesteria.
Sounds like a dream I had one night after drinking Arrogant Bastard and eating a bunch of pizza.
It would take me forever to realize.
Ok solved. Thread closed.
There is a dedicated game thread as well. :good: