Any Gay here who still can't accept himself? - Off-topic

I'm gay and I'm always wondering if there is somebody like me who still can't accept themselves as a gay men. I believed I'm already Gay since I was a kid like 4, because I've had a feeling towards men in that age already. Like having a crush with them. I clearly remember that. And the usual kids were making a jokes of marrying a woman, but not me, I want to marry a boy instead. Lol.
In my case, you won't notice I'm Gay. I dressed like a real guy, I moved and speak like a real man. My family don't even know I'm gay. I lived in a Muslim country and in a muslim community. In short I am a Muslim(please no bad comments just because I am a Muslim). It's quite difficult for me to reveal my real identity because of my surroundings. Though I fallen in love already with my best friend, I still managed myself not to pursue what I wanted. There were also so many gays who entertained me, but because I am not serious about it, I always ignored them. I really wanted to be a real man. I always pray that one morning I woke up and becomes straight already. But this is me. This is inborn. Nothings happen really!
I've always dreaming of marrying a woman, having kids and a normal family. But I am very afraid that I might just hurt my wife because I can't really love a woman truly.
Anyone here like me too? Well I guess......... I don't know. Lol

Just cause you like dudes doesn't mean you're not a "real man", bro
I hope you can find some support here or irl, it must be quite difficult for you in the situation you're in but you have my acceptance even if you can't accept yourself (Y)

Thank you so much! Your comment are really appreciated. :angel: God bless you and your family.

I'm not gay but my entire family is.

wizkid92 said:
I'm not gay but my entire family is.
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God blessed you mate and to your family too. You must be very careful to your sorroundings and in social media too. I am in Malaysia and even the majority of people here are Muslims, Gays are everywhere and it is spreading rapidly. It's worldwide. Take care mate and I belived it's hard to convert back to straight.

Having a preference for the same gender is always a choice of *will* more so than any other factor realistically speaking. Be that as it may, those choices reside betwixt you and God alone. That being stated, coming from a Muslim related country, you are indeed wise to tread carefully. Even in Malaysia.
God's wisdom be with you always.

Related

Job interview at best buy mobile tomorrow HELPPPPP

Ok long story short I'm a 2nd year college student and I've worked at a gas station/convenience store for about 2 years and some change. I'm a huge tech person and love mobile phones (which xda member doesn't). I recently applied for a position at a best buy mobile opening up next month and got an interview tomorrow morning and I'm so nervous. Any pointers???? Tips??. I believe I can sell a phone to someone easily. For example. "the evo 4g is a wonderful phone and may be one of the best phone's on the sprint network. It has lightning fast data speeds thanks to sprint's 4g network and a beautiful 4.3 inch screen. All that packaged with a great mobile OS called android. The camera on it is fantastic it includes 720p recording and there is even an hdmi port on the device to playback movies on your big screen at home. The 1ghz snapdragon makes the phone extremely fast and it is great for multitasking." and etc I'd include more specs and ask what features they are looking for on a phone and tell them what the phone can do to meet their requirements. Any tips please help I'm so nervous
Everyone thinks they will be so enthusiastic when selling tech. I work at a computer repair shop/store, and trust me, customers are way to stupid t care what you have to say. All they want to know is if they can make a phone call, text, update their FB status and take a picture of their son drowning.
Also if you are a regular consumer, and reading this, yes, you are stupid.
As the interview part. Get some rest, come in for the interview about 15 minutes earlier, smile, dress nicely, smile, don't sweat, smile, be respectful of your interviewer, smile, have any and all paper work ready, and don't forget to smile. Also, brush your teeth and smile. Did I say smile? Don't make it a fake smile, but a relaxed smile. And not a smirk because then they will think you think you're too good for this job.
jaszek said:
Everyone thinks they will be so enthusiastic when selling tech. I work at a computer repair shop/store, and trust me, customers are way to stupid t care what you have to say. All they want to know is if they can make a phone call, text, update their FB status and take a picture of their son drowning.
Also if you are a regular consumer, and reading this, yes, you are stupid.
As the interview part. Get some rest, come in for the interview about 15 minutes earlier, smile, dress nicely, smile, don't sweat, smile, be respectful of your interviewer, smile, have any and all paper work ready, and don't forget to smile. Also, brush your teeth and smile. Did I say smile? Don't make it a fake smile, but a relaxed smile. And not a smirk because then they will think you think you're too good for this job.
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Thnx for the response. I'm extremely nervous still. Should go to sleep soon but want some tips first. I don't have a resume hopefully that won't affect the interview but I have some black dress pants a nice grey sweater and some black loafers for the interview.
Any idea's on questions they may ask?
"Why do you want this job?"
"What makes you think you're good for this job?"
"What makes you better then everybody else applying for this position?"
"What's your name?"
"How old are you?"(if you look young)
"What's your number?" <<<<<This is a trick question. If they don't ask you, but tell you they'll call you back, guess what, they ain't callin you back. lol
"Do you like oral sex?"
"Would you do sexual favors to get this job?"
Ok Kidding with the last two, but you get the general point. The interview will last about 10 or 15 minutes so you don't have to worry.
Also, I might want to mention you are talking to someone who never had a job interview. lol. But don't worry, I went to business school so they made us learn as if we had an interview the next day.
lol thanks. I just need to find a way to relax. Idk why I interact with customers on the regular at my job and suggest things to them sure it's mostly chips or a drink but I'm used to interacting with people I just meet. I just want to get a new job sooooo bad
mcp2009 said:
lol thanks. I just need to find a way to relax. Idk why I interact with customers on the regular at my job and suggest things to them sure it's mostly chips or a drink but I'm used to interacting with people I just meet. I just want to get a new job sooooo bad
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Weed. Just kidding.....kinda
booyakasha said:
Weed. Just kidding.....kinda
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Lol if only it was possible. Take a few puffs and when the interviewer asks me why my eyes look shut I say its because I'm asian I kid I kid I kid.
When I'm cross-interviewing the sales guys... well, here's what I look for:
1. Intelligence - the ability to obtain and retain knowledge. Simple stuff like knowing some info about the company and the tech, etc. Bonus points for understanding the industry and its players, especially if they understand the company's positioning compared to its competitors.
2. Coherence & communication - the ability of the salesperson to present the idea and information that the customer will be able to understand
3. Control of vocal tone - for salespeople who deal directly with customers, having a good tone of voice can "hypnotize" the customers.
4. Physical presentation - I'm not looking for Miss Universe, but dress appropriately. A good way of dressing will be to dress according to the dress-code of the company or slightly overdress. Only slightly.
5. Passion - I must be able to see that you have a passion in the industry, in yourself and in the things that you do. If I see that you lack the energy/drive, you'll be hard-pressed to get hired in a highly rewarding position.
Do note that we are hiring sales people who earn at least 50% more than their peers, so the bar is set pretty high up.
Don't worry about tech-stuff, because that'll come in a briefing package. Don't worry about sales tricks either, because seniors will teach you if you ask nicely.
jaszek said:
"Why do you want this job?"
"What makes you think you're good for this job?"
"What makes you better then everybody else applying for this position?"
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these .
not jokes , u gotta prepare for these type of bs questions ! look em up on google "bull**** interview questions"
whew interview went good. Even had to correct the guy because he asked me if I heard about the swift for sprint and I said no and he said really? and I said wait what manufacturer and he said HTC and I asked do you mean the shift with the qwerty keyboard and he said "yea that's it you might know more then me" he said he'll call today to let me know if I got the job.
jaszek said:
Everyone thinks they will be so enthusiastic when selling tech. I work at a computer repair shop/store, and trust me, customers are way to stupid t care what you have to say. All they want to know is if they can make a phone call, text, update their FB status and take a picture of their son drowning.
Also if you are a regular consumer, and reading this, yes, you are stupid.
As the interview part. Get some rest, come in for the interview about 15 minutes earlier, smile, dress nicely, smile, don't sweat, smile, be respectful of your interviewer, smile, have any and all paper work ready, and don't forget to smile. Also, brush your teeth and smile. Did I say smile? Don't make it a fake smile, but a relaxed smile. And not a smirk because then they will think you think you're too good for this job.
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You forgot to tell him how important smiling is!
telmoabff said:
You forgot to tell him how important smiling is!
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of course, just imagine you have a clown in front of you
Just remember they are people.
They are looking for someone that not only isn't stupid, but someone they can get along with.
They know they are going to have to train you - any knowledge you have before hand can and will help - but isn't the deciding factor in you getting the job.
Although the job doesn't require a resume - if you had one you'd probably be a step ahead of the other 9 billion stoners trying to get a job there.
Do not dress like a slob - but don't OVER dress either - the slacks/sweater is going to be fine. Can't tell you how many times I've seen people show up in full clown suits for a call center job - and here I am in the Summer wearing a t-shirt and shorts with a ball cap on.
Practice interviewing with someone your comfortable with - even if the questions are BS - it helps.
And I have interviewed at least 1000 people - and I can tell you - if your relaxed, dressed appropriately, don't bull**** me, and at least convey to me in an intelligent manner that you know what your talking about - you would be hired.
And.. if you don't get the job - don't sweat it. Just means some uber nerd ended up working for them instead of you. Might be a blessing in disguise
avgjoegeek said:
Can't tell you how many times I've seen people show up in full clown suits for a call center job -
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..thanks for the tip ...now I know where I can definitely find a more descent job
mcp2009 said:
whew interview went good. Even had to correct the guy because he asked me if I heard about the swift for sprint and I said no and he said really? and I said wait what manufacturer and he said HTC and I asked do you mean the shift with the qwerty keyboard and he said "yea that's it you might know more then me" he said he'll call today to let me know if I got the job. Next step if I get it is drug test. I hope I pass, took like 4 hits on a one hitter on new years eve (I know dumb) and I smoke bout 3 or 4 hits a month. So scared I guess I'll buy a home test first
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Congrats dude
(And lol )
update!!! Got the job!! Training on monday
mcp2009 said:
update!!! Got the job!! Training on monday
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Yay! Congrats! When are you gonna buy us a proverbial beer?
When it comes to selling, I would suggest that you should start with asking questions.
Sure for you the EVO is an awesome phone but alot of people are turned off by the size. Etc.
zizux said:
When it comes to selling, I would suggest that you should start with asking questions.
Sure for you the EVO is an awesome phone but alot of people are turned off by the size. Etc.
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I heard a lot of girls are actually turned on by the size.
Well done!

Bringing out the worst in me...

Alrighty then, what brings out the worst in oneself?
For me, it is boredom. When I'm bored, I transform into a malevolent being capable of endless joy and humour.
At others' expense.
People asking ridiculous questions on this forum really grinds my gears.
Lane discipline on islands, bad drivers in general.
Sent from my HTC Desire using XDA App
mercianary said:
Lane discipline on islands, bad drivers in general.
Sent from my HTC Desire using XDA App
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+over 9000
I HATE middle-lane drivers and people cutting across roundabout lanes when I'm trying to turn right.
People, in general.
Not the like-minded ones who gravitate to the same hang-out spots that i do, just the 99.9% general public/hoi-poloi/great unwashed masses, who share nothing except their inability to raise their average IQ's above that of a Tapeworm.
DirkGently1 said:
People, in general.
Not the like-minded ones who gravitate to the same hang-out spots that i do, just the 99.9% general public/hoi-poloi/great unwashed masses, who share nothing except their inability to raise their average IQ's above that of a Tampon.
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I corrected that for you
johncmolyneux said:
+over 9000
I HATE middle-aged drivers and people cutting across lanes when I'm trying to turn.
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FTFM. Now that you know how I drive...
Spam from the dead!
-We do what we must because we can; for the good of all of us, except the ones who are dead-
Holy Necro-Thread Batman!
I was about to post that it was a good idea for a thread..
..and then realised it was. 3 months ago!
I don't even remember posting in it before. Second bite at the apple... i would still say that people being dumb grinds my gears. It's got nothing to do with education. You can teach a monkey to solve puzzles. I'm not impressed by qualifications. Any idiot can memorise a bunch of stuff, regurgitate it in an exam and get 'qualified'.
I respect people for having original thoughts of their own. For being creative. Isaac Newton realised that contemporary Math wasn't cutting it.. so he invented Trigonometry. INVENTED it. I can barely spell it! Of course, while he was mostly focused on turning Lead into Gold, he somehow found the time to discover Gravity and come up with the Laws of Motion.
The highly qualified people is see at work every day are chemical Engineers and even Doctors. I sometimes wonder how some of them even manage to tie their own shoe-lace some days. Most of them are as clever as a block of cheese.
There's no excuse for being dumb. If you feel that perhaps you are dumb? Pick up some books! You've got one lifetime to find out as much as you can about the universe. Don't you feel the clock ticking...?
I can read minds, doesn't that make sense?
It's uncanny how you can sum up my frustrations into one rant. And somehow you managed to remove the swearing I would have incorporated into it as well!
-We do what we must because we can; for the good of all of us, except the ones who are dead-
I_am_Error said:
I can read minds, doesn't that make sense?
It's uncanny how you can sum up my frustrations into one rant. And somehow you managed to remove the swearing I would have incorporated into it as well!
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It took an extra five minutes to edit out the swearies..!
Seriously though, i've been around people of all walks of life. There are two individuals that spring to mind. One was a Tree Surgeon, (arborist), and the other was a common labourer...same as i was. The former was my age, my level of 'education', and even in my line of work.. but man did he make me think. He questioned everything, (same as i did), but the conversations we had would go on forever. "If i kicked out the door-stop...", one conversation went.. "where does the energy go when the door slams shut?", he asked. That one went on for hours!
Bearing in mind that this this was a fit, popular guy with a stunning girlfriend and a career in manual labour. He was a wealth of knowledge about Cetaceans, and most anything about the animal kingdom. He taught me that i still had a lot to learn myself! It wasn't the fact that this stuff even crossed his mind that surprised me.. it was that he questioned everything. It was that curiosity that made him awesome. You could see that behind his eyes were cogs that were always turning. Someone else with a thirst for knowledge!
The other example was a kid i knew who was trying to earn a bit of cash-in-hand, doing the hard labour on a day-rate. We'd chat while we worked and we'd get into the deeper discussions of Evolutionary Psychology, for example. Told well, maybe some students will listen... of those, some might even understand the subject matter. Of those who understand, you might find a few who could go one step further and add something novel to the conversation.. come up with an original suggestion or two of their own. So here's a 17 year old kid who having never even thought about it before is suddenly discussing the subject with me like a pro! Not only discussing it, but taking it places even i hadn't thought of. He's making me re-think my own beliefs!
That is insight! That is the same flexibility of mind that led the great thinkers of our time to advance science, not only in small steps, but in giant leaps! Few have that ability..and when it comes, it's often from the most unexpected places! Einstein was a Patent Clerk, for instance. Ok, he was a Math prodigy too, but i bet he didn't waste his free time watching reality TV shows!
If only a fraction of the people in the world were allowed to reach their potential, we'd be in the midst of a second Renaissance right now. Instead, we're held back as a race by short-sightedness, inertia, dogma..and an unforgivable amount of ignorance!
*And that, Ladies and germs, will have to be my rant for the night! I'm sure it could have been a better read, but i'm not one of those who will advance human knowledge in any significant way. One of you you could be though...if you could just get off of your fat, lazy arses first!
DirkGently said:
Holy Necro-Thread Batman!
I was about to post that it was a good idea for a thread..
..and then realised it was. 3 months ago!
I don't even remember posting in it before. Second bite at the apple... i would still say that people being dumb grinds my gears. It's got nothing to do with education. You can teach a monkey to solve puzzles. I'm not impressed by qualifications. Any idiot can memorise a bunch of stuff, regurgitate it in an exam and get 'qualified'.
I respect people for having original thoughts of their own. For being creative. Isaac Newton realised that contemporary Math wasn't cutting it.. so he invented Trigonometry. INVENTED it. I can barely spell it! Of course, while he was mostly focused on turning Lead into Gold, he somehow found the time to discover Gravity and come up with the Laws of Motion.
The highly qualified people is see at work every day are chemical Engineers and even Doctors. I sometimes wonder how some of them even manage to tie their own shoe-lace some days. Most of them are as clever as a block of cheese.
There's no excuse for being dumb. If you feel that perhaps you are dumb? Pick up some books! You've got one lifetime to find out as much as you can about the universe. Don't you feel the clock ticking...?
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Man, thats's all WAAAAAY to serious for the OT forum
the_scotsman said:
Man, thats's all WAAAAAY to serious for the OT forum
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What blasphemy is this? Most people in ot that I converse with tend to be far more serious than most people out of OT OT iz sruz bidness. Don't belittle us lol jk
-We do what we must because we can; for the good of all of us, except the ones who are dead-
Lulz, how did my drunken rambles end up in here
Anyway, that's a few million more of my own brain cells successfully killed off. Or at least that's how it feels this morning!

Has the word THANKS and SORRY become to cheap?

Do you think that, too?
Quite the opposite, i reckon they're still not used enough. Of course it's become easier to do online but people are still reserved and reticent to be polite to strangers. Natural reaction i guess. Perhaps the fact that people are being polite online may carry over to real life eventually?
Personally i've always found myself being awkward in real life social situations and heartfelt stuff just makes it worse. Gotta be drunk for that stuff! No such problem saying Thanks, please, sorry etc on here though.
I don't think the mods will like that. A "thank you" is a thing you'll have to deserve.
I will however 'Thank' any currently serving, or previously serving, member of any of the Armed Services on principal.
Should the OP decide to enlist and serve his Queen and Country i will be the first to hit that button!
Luckily for you, i am the queen Now, let's get f-ed up gentlemen!
I hate Justin bayber, will you thank me?
Sent from my SGH-T959 using XDA App
WTS thanks hitting. 1$ each. pm me
(kidding don't ban me)
But that doesn't help when you secretly have a crush on Rebecca Black. So no, i can't thank you yet.
BazookaAce said:
Luckily for you, i am the queen Now, let's get f-ed up gentlemen!
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Hear, hear!
Cheers!
Edit: Can i borrow a couple of your commonwealth countries for the weekend? Nothing important...perhaps Canada & Australia? I promise to return them in good condition!
If you have kids then you know what Im talking about.. Sorry loses its meaning very VERY fast... lol
Shift_Lock said:
If you have kids then you know what Im talking about.. Sorry loses its meaning very VERY fast... lol
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Lulz! So you feel like you're being played? Kids are masters at manipulation and will stop at nothing! The two 'angels' that i share a house with know exactly how to wrap me in knots.
Bless 'em. (They're not mine so i only have to digest them in bite sized chunks).
When i was younger i had terrible trouble admitting when i was wrong. I would defend my argument long after it had stopped being logical. I think that's common too. It stings the pride. I'm glad i'm not like that any more.
LOL! The 4 year old is the worst.. she runs her mom. her brother and her sister.. I try to keep it together... but damn... she knows all the tricks!
Shift_Lock said:
LOL! The 4 year old is the worst.. she runs her mom. her brother and her sister.. I try to keep it together... but damn... she knows all the tricks!
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The ones here are 4 (boy) and 5 (girl) and boy does she think she's the boss! My landlord is the most patient people person i've ever known, and is far too kind to be a disciplinarian, (he took me in after all), but she takes every advantage of the fact.
"Daughter of mine, you're going to bed soon so turn off that computer and go brush your teeth".
"No daddy, we don't go to bed at this time and i will play this some more, and then i will watch television for a while...", in the sweetest voice imaginable, as if she's explaining the way things are to a total idiot.
I love it! She always does what i ask her though.
They could be the most important words ever spoken to a person
Sent from my ADR6350 using xda premium

There was a girl but I have completely lost contact.

I had her email.
Chatted with her on AIM
Actually she still has her account but hasn't signed in.
She deleted her Yahoo so no contact.
What should I do?
verycoolalan said:
i had her email.
Chatted with her on aim
actually she still has her account but hasn't signed in.
She deleted her yahoo so no contact.
What should i do?
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find a new girl alan
fleurdelisxliv said:
find a new girl alan
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+1.
-We do what we must because we can; for the good of all of us, except the ones who are dead-
She didn't delete it, she blocked you.
jaszek said:
She didn't delete it, she blocked you.
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Ouch
Sent from my LG-P999 using xda premium
VeryCoolAlan said:
What should I do?
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Continue with life. You have very little choice.
jaszek said:
She didn't delete it, she blocked you.
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Haha! If she is that girl for whom you opened 3 threads,she's blocked you for sure xD
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dexter93 said:
Haha! If she is that girl for whom you opened 3 threads,she's blocked you for sure xD
Sent from my GT-S5570 using XDA App
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Haha nahh they were about three different girls.
Lol okay
Sent from my SGH-T959 using xda premium
Just float on man. No woman is worth the trouble. Just ask error or me. They're a pain in the arse.
-My life is a shooting range, people never change-
Alan, personally i think you're a bloody nice bloke. You're open, honest, sincere.. and i don't think you'd know a scruple if it hit you in the face. Basically you're too nice for most girls you're age. Hell, too nice for most girls full stop. You are in more danger of getting into the 'friendship zone' than any man i know!
All that means is you'll find it hard to find a woman that deserves you. The others will be going after guys that treat them crap, that don't appreciate them and who take them for granted, while you are left looking on from the sidelines wondering to yourself, "what the hell does she see in him?" That is the lot of the nice guy i'm afraid.
The good news is that those aren't the women you want to be with, and you're better off without them anyway. Right now, if one of the more shallow females that you may be acquainted with started showing interest, you would be right to question if there may be a chance that you became a gaping asshole over-night. If however, an equally kind and sincere woman decided to show some interest, no matter how long it took for that to happen, you would know that it's something worth betting the bank on.
The worst thing you could do right now, and the biggest pitfall, would be to try and be someone you're not, just to attract someone you like. Tempting as it may be to try and elevate your status to that of some sort of man-god, women of either kind will see right through that facade. Either way you'd lose!
What you should be doing right now is carrying on with your life. By all means take the opportunity to speak to as many members of the opposite sex as possible. But do it as one person to another, not as some post-pubescent teenager desperate to get his rocks off, Otherwise you may as well tattoo 'i want to get laid' on your forehead, guaranteeing that it will never happen! Don't be a douche, be the nice guy that you actually are. Be yourself.
Of course if you're good, you can fake confidence and charm. I know this from experience. You can trick a woman into liking you. But ultimately, you lose big time doing that. You can't keep up the pretence forever, and you'll always be with a person you have no respect for anyway. Epic Fail basically!
I'd say that perhaps 5% of the worlds population are decent people. People that i personally would want to know. I'd include you in that small percentage. Sadly that means that the odds are stacked against you when it comes to finding a suitable partner. After all, you shouldn't have to settle for one of the 95%, and everyone on your level is fighting it out for the remaining 5%! But on the upside, those 5% of decent women and prospective partners have already ruled out the 95% of sub-standard men and are looking for the 5% that they would be happy with too.
Another way to interpret that is to say that if you are average, and you are looking for average, there's a damn good chance that something will happen for you... no matter how 'average' that something is. If you are above average, and are looking for something that is equally decent, you had better bloody well be patient; but the payoff will be so much better in the end.
The way i see it playing out? One day when you're still scratching around in desperation trying to pinpoint your ideal woman, she'll already be in your life, trying to make herself known to you... and if you're lucky, you won't miss the signals.
Two things:
He is 14 or 15 (should be concentrating on having a life and school)
and he is a Troll...and this comes from a troll...I guess it takes one to know one
If I see any more threads like this I'ma lose it
When i was 15 i was already living with a girl. I wish there had been the Internet back then to vent my spleen in. As it was i had to write letters through a Sunday School support scheme for 'adolescent issues'. If i needed support with my teen problems i was SOL.
Alan is a genuine guy facing the same problems as any guy his age. He deserves a little guidance. God knows i wish i had some at that age!
Great advice Dirk. You are a true gentleman. Wise words as always. I (and I'm sure many others) read and respect many of your posts.
DirkGently said:
Alan, personally i think you're a bloody nice bloke. You're open, honest, sincere.. and i don't think you'd know a scruple if it hit you in the face. Basically you're too nice for most girls you're age. Hell, too nice for most girls full stop. You are in more danger of getting into the 'friendship zone' than any man i know!
All that means is you'll find it hard to find a woman that deserves you. The others will be going after guys that treat them crap, that don't appreciate them and who take them for granted, while you are left looking on from the sidelines wondering to yourself, "what the hell does she see in him?" That is the lot of the nice guy i'm afraid.
The good news is that those aren't the women you want to be with, and you're better off without them anyway. Right now, if one of the more shallow females that you may be acquainted with started showing interest, you would be right to question if there may be a chance that you became a gaping asshole over-night. If however, an equally kind and sincere woman decided to show some interest, no matter how long it took for that to happen, you would know that it's something worth betting the bank on.
The worst thing you could do right now, and the biggest pitfall, would be to try and be someone you're not, just to attract someone you like. Tempting as it may be to try and elevate your status to that of some sort of man-god, women of either kind will see right through that facade. Either way you'd lose!
What you should be doing right now is carrying on with your life. By all means take the opportunity to speak to as many members of the opposite sex as possible. But do it as one person to another, not as some post-pubescent teenager desperate to get his rocks off, Otherwise you may as well tattoo 'i want to get laid' on your forehead, guaranteeing that it will never happen! Don't be a douche, be the nice guy that you actually are. Be yourself.
Of course if you're good, you can fake confidence and charm. I know this from experience. You can trick a woman into liking you. But ultimately, you lose big time doing that. You can't keep up the pretence forever, and you'll always be with a person you have no respect for anyway. Epic Fail basically!
I'd say that perhaps 5% of the worlds population are decent people. People that i personally would want to know. I'd include you in that small percentage. Sadly that means that the odds are stacked against you when it comes to finding a suitable partner. After all, you shouldn't have to settle for one of the 95%, and everyone on your level is fighting it out for the remaining 5%! But on the upside, those 5% of decent women and prospective partners have already ruled out the 95% of sub-standard men and are looking for the 5% that they would be happy with too.
Another way to interpret that is to say that if you are average, and you are looking for average, there's a damn good chance that something will happen for you... no matter how 'average' that something is. If you are above average, and are looking for something that is equally decent, you had better bloody well be patient; but the payoff will be so much better in the end.
The way i see it playing out? One day when you're still scratching around in desperation trying to pinpoint your ideal woman, she'll already be in your life, trying to make herself known to you... and if you're lucky, you won't miss the signals.
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Click to collapse
Yes! You understand me!
I always see really pretty girls be like made fun of and yet it makes them like them better. I tried that once but ended up being an ass so I stopped and went back to be myself. I also tried to dress differently and didn't like it. So i went back to baggy ripped jeans and a plain $5 shirt.
I also know about the too nice guy thing. People always tell me I'm too nice and when my someone make fun of me someone always tells me why I don't standup for myself....I don't know maybe I just don't like violence or yelling.
Anyways...thanks a lot for this advice!!!!
So now moving on xD
Should I chase another girl at school? or just not care?
DirkGently said:
Alan, personally i think you're a bloody nice bloke. You're open, honest, sincere.. and i don't think you'd know a scruple if it hit you in the face. Basically you're too nice for most girls you're age. Hell, too nice for most girls full stop. You are in more danger of getting into the 'friendship zone' than any man i know!
All that means is you'll find it hard to find a woman that deserves you. The others will be going after guys that treat them crap, that don't appreciate them and who take them for granted, while you are left looking on from the sidelines wondering to yourself, "what the hell does she see in him?" That is the lot of the nice guy i'm afraid.
The good news is that those aren't the women you want to be with, and you're better off without them anyway. Right now, if one of the more shallow females that you may be acquainted with started showing interest, you would be right to question if there may be a chance that you became a gaping asshole over-night. If however, an equally kind and sincere woman decided to show some interest, no matter how long it took for that to happen, you would know that it's something worth betting the bank on.
The worst thing you could do right now, and the biggest pitfall, would be to try and be someone you're not, just to attract someone you like. Tempting as it may be to try and elevate your status to that of some sort of man-god, women of either kind will see right through that facade. Either way you'd lose!
What you should be doing right now is carrying on with your life. By all means take the opportunity to speak to as many members of the opposite sex as possible. But do it as one person to another, not as some post-pubescent teenager desperate to get his rocks off, Otherwise you may as well tattoo 'i want to get laid' on your forehead, guaranteeing that it will never happen! Don't be a douche, be the nice guy that you actually are. Be yourself.
Of course if you're good, you can fake confidence and charm. I know this from experience. You can trick a woman into liking you. But ultimately, you lose big time doing that. You can't keep up the pretence forever, and you'll always be with a person you have no respect for anyway. Epic Fail basically!
I'd say that perhaps 5% of the worlds population are decent people. People that i personally would want to know. I'd include you in that small percentage. Sadly that means that the odds are stacked against you when it comes to finding a suitable partner. After all, you shouldn't have to settle for one of the 95%, and everyone on your level is fighting it out for the remaining 5%! But on the upside, those 5% of decent women and prospective partners have already ruled out the 95% of sub-standard men and are looking for the 5% that they would be happy with too.
Another way to interpret that is to say that if you are average, and you are looking for average, there's a damn good chance that something will happen for you... no matter how 'average' that something is. If you are above average, and are looking for something that is equally decent, you had better bloody well be patient; but the payoff will be so much better in the end.
The way i see it playing out? One day when you're still scratching around in desperation trying to pinpoint your ideal woman, she'll already be in your life, trying to make herself known to you... and if you're lucky, you won't miss the signals.
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
That was so deep man
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VeryCoolAlan said:
Yes! You understand me!
I always see really pretty girls be like made fun of and yet it makes them like them better. I tried that once but ended up being an ass so I stopped and went back to be myself. I also tried to dress differently and didn't like it. So i went back to baggy ripped jeans and a plain $5 shirt.
I also know about the too nice guy thing. People always tell me I'm too nice and when my someone make fun of me someone always tells me why I don't standup for myself....I don't know maybe I just don't like violence or yelling.
Anyways...thanks a lot for this advice!!!!
So now moving on xD
Should I chase another girl at school? or just not care?
Click to expand...
Click to collapse
Definitely move on to another girl in school, hell move to a girl at a different school, they don't know you as well as the others do and its like starting over, I'm 16 so I know this works (atleast for me)
Good luck!
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My ex-girlfriend cheated on me. She is pregnant with my baby. FML.

Wow, so today I found out that my ex-girlfriend now, been messaging her ex-boyfriend telling him he misses her and loves her and wants to be with him behind my back. Let me remind you that she is pregnant with my kid. I read her google chat log and found out all different kind of messages. I was completely shocked and completely *****ed at her. I told her stup*d as* to pack up her sh!t and get the f*ck out of my house. To think I was going to marry her as*.
Wow that's harsh man. Sorry to hear it. If there was no kid involved I'd say you're lucky to have found out, but that's just wrong on the little one. What a role model Mummy's gonna be
Sorry to hear that also, I think you need to care about your child now. Try not to confront her or him, just don't give a crap for the well being of your child (that needs to be your primary focus from now on).
Cheers man and good luck.
Archer said:
Wow that's harsh man. Sorry to hear it. If there was no kid involved I'd say you're lucky to have found out, but that's just wrong on the little one. What a role model Mummy's gonna be
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Click to collapse
Yeah, I really ended up with something huh.. Nice way to start off the New Years.. F*ck that b!tch!
UPDATE: She's calling me telling me sorry and how she doesnt want me to leave.. What a dumb b!tch. Seriously. I told her to get the f*ck out of my life and get her sh!t out. Tired of her bullsh!t.
Mr. Clown said:
Sorry to hear that also, I think you need to care about your child now. Try not to confront her or him, just don't give a crap for the well being of your child (that needs to be your primary focus from now on).
Cheers man and good luck.
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Archer said:
Wow that's harsh man. Sorry to hear it. If there was no kid involved I'd say you're lucky to have found out, but that's just wrong on the little one. What a role model Mummy's gonna be
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Click to collapse
Thank you both for hearing me out. Really appreciate the comments. Its good to talk to someone about something awful like this.
Make sure you don't sign that birth certificate until you get DNA confirmation that it's your baby.
I have a friend that got trapped and is paying child support on a child that's not his because he signed (acknowledged) that the child was his.
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Above&Beyond™ said:
Yeah, I really ended up with something huh.. Nice way to start off the New Years.. F*ck that b!tch!
UPDATE: She's calling me telling me sorry and how she doesnt want me to leave.. What a dumb b!tch. Seriously. I told her to get the f*ck out of my life and get her sh!t out. Tired of her bullsh!t.
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Click to collapse
That's going to be a hard line to take if she's pregnant with your child... sounds like she might be a part of your life for good now, one way or the other. :/
Still, sorry to hear it bro.
Yeah, it's a tough situation all round. As said above, you are going to be involved in her life now for many, many years, so as Mr Clown said you need to forget your anger towards them because the little one is the most important thing.
Obviously, I agree with Android300ZX that a DNA test is a wise precaution.
Just one pertinent question: Are you sure it's your kid?
One thing to say: She's only sorry because she got caught. Ditch the b*tch bro, plenty of other chicks out there.
also MAKE SURE U RECORD everything when it come time to back what u need ex tv,couch,phone,printer,computer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkt7Dx_uK5Y SHE DA CHEATING HO*
Its cheaper to keep her. Eff child support. My dad had to go through it 7, yes that's right, SEVEN times.
-My life is a shooting range, people never change-
watt9493 said:
Its cheaper to keep her. Eff child support. My dad had to go through it 7, yes that's right, SEVEN times.
-My life is a shooting range, people never change-
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Click to collapse
This statement really pisses me off. One of my employees always says it all the time. It is not about what option is less expensive...it is about what makes you both happy.
You both need to have a heart to heart and decide if you want to make things work or if it is best to separate ways. Take it from someone who was married for 6 years with someone who didnt seem like he wanted to be there...in the end, I was tired of being in love with a man that didn't seem to feel the same about me and we were divorced. Now I am a single mom and things are much better off.
Examine your relationship now before you get to involved. Your baby will be best with 2 parents who love each other, rather then 2 parents who only stay together for the kid.
I agree you should catalog everything that you had pre-relationship with her. It's not marriage but things can go south very fast. I also agree with who ever posted about not signing the birth certificate until you know 110% sure that the baby is yours. I had a girlfriend who was messing around with other guys behind my back when she got pregnant (found that out after we went through everything). Good luck bro
Damn... Sorry to hear that bro
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Hey man, altough you think this is the end of the world, it isn´t. Let your friends and family comfort you, that life goes on.
That will be a prolonged pain. Find time to spend totally away from her to heal.
I'm gonna go back on what I previously said, after thinking about it some more. We've all made mistakes - I've made tons of them! If you care enough about the girl to be planning a family and marriage with her then maybe it's worth at least seeing what happens.
It's easy for someone not in the situation to knee-jerk but what do we know about how you two really feel about each other? Nothing.
Just use this place to vent and see our responses, then ignore them all completely and do what's best for you, your misses and the little one. Just be honest and you can't go wrong.
I usually don't repeat myself but:
-Make sure you get a DNA test!
-A lot of females use that (I'm pregnant) against a guy to keep him. It may very well be true but be careful.
-Record everything! Make a backup on Gmail. I would use Google Voice and have Google Voice be your primary voicemail. If she calls you and leaves a voicemail it will get saved to Google Voice where you can download it to your desktop and keep it on file.
-Take most if not all the things she says to you with a grain of salt.
-Make sure you don't end up looking like the deadbeat that just picked up and left. They tend to make themselves look like the victim to their friends and family.
-If the child is yours take care of your business and appreciate them because they are pure.
-If you find it in your heart to forgive her make sure you really forgive her and not bring it up when you get into the occasional argument.
I have experience in this. My GF cheated on me twice. The first time she would go out with her "girls" (multiple instances of partying with her "girls" and coming back late in the AM) and I found out she was going out with a guy that I knew who was in our circle of friends. She would cut school and hang out with this guy all the while I was paying for her education. She doesn't work or hasn't in the 4 years we've been together because I took care of everything as a man. The second time I caught her was on her birthday when I came home early (unannounced) from work to surprise her and caught her leaving the neighbors house and overheard her on the phone discussing the events with her BFF. I couldn't forgive her because the thought of me seeing this guy's car every day and the fact that I know he's be laughing at me from behind the confines of his home taking me for a sucker. The only reason I haven't pummeled his face in is because of my daughter.
I have a kid with her and I still live with her but we are only together for the sake of my daughter. She graduates this month from school and will get a job in her field so we will sit down and discuss our arrangements and separation.
Just make sure you cover all your bases man.
*** Again, Do the DNA test!! Don't fall for that guilt trip she may put on your about you denying your child and not trusting her ***
They will use that against you and make you succumb to signing the certificate.
Hang in there man, it's tough. I think that you best pursue what's going to be the best for your son or daughter.
There is a test they can do for paternity during gestation, it determines gender among other things of the child, mostly done for at risk older mothers.
If in the end you find you are a father, ill tell you first hand (literally holding my Lil guy) its a feeling like no other. You've got to do what's best for your own, which will likely be to split. Your gf likely grew up on a household with a limited example of a father figure, and you certainly don't want your own kid to turn into the same type of person as her.
Yeah, DNA test seems good suggestion. Make sure wich base it came from. Also maybe ask for a ETA.
Oké, now go to Dr Phill or Jerry Springer. Last time i checked it was a technical forum.
Cheers

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